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03/22/2017 08:30 AMBack in 2014, as a new mom living in a new town, Ruth Montgomery didn’t need her licensed baccalaureate social work (LBSW) degree to recognize the benefits of joining a free, local program designed to support, inform and connect new moms at Women & Family Life Center (WFLC).
She found an instant connection through WFLC’s Breastfeeding Support Group and from that, last year, Ruth began co-leading her own program at WFLC, Mom-to-Mom. Now, Ruth is excited to invite moms of young ones to join her at the group’s free session on a new day and time, the first and third Saturday of each month, from 10 to 11 a.m.
A Guilford resident and mom to Maddie, nearly three, and Josh, who just turned one, Ruth had recently transplanted to the east coast from Texas when she found WFLC.
“We were new to the area, and I was desperate for some fellow moms to hang out with and get to know,” says Ruth. “I came across a listing for the breast-feeding group and I came here. I was very lucky, because I met all my friends in that group, and I just kept coming back.”
Ruth soon signed on to volunteer with WFLC. Just two weeks ago, Ruth took another step with WFLC: joining the center’s staff as WFLC’s new office coordinator.
“When I was in Texas, with my degree in licensed social work, I’ve worked in school systems, and I’ve worked with elderly people and really a lot of different areas. So this is really a great fit for me, because it reaches women at almost all points of life, which is perfect,” says Ruth.
That first program which brought Ruth here continues to be offered at WFLC with group founder Heather Henry, a nurse and lactation consultant. The Breastfeeding Support Group meets from 11 a.m. to noon on select Tuesdays (upcoming dates include April 4 and 18), when Henry provides a supportive environment and answers questions for moms seeking help with breastfeeding questions. It was due to the Breastfeeding Support Group’s success in bringing new moms together that WFLC Program Director Wendy DeLucca saw the perfect opportunity to create Mom-to-Mom. About a year ago, she asked Ruth and Danielle Faulkner, who has a background in nutrition and holistic health, to co-lead Mom-to-Mom.
“When Wendy asked if I would like to facilitate that group, I said of course I would like to get back to that,” says Ruth “The group had started out as breastfeeding support, very specifically, and while we found women would obviously come with questions or concerns, more often than not they’d come to spend time out of the house, to meet with other moms, and to have a grown-up conversation about something other than peanut butter!”
Danielle and Ruth are experienced professionals who bring both personal experience and their skills to Mom-to-Mom.
“I think we have different strengths, just as anybody does, so if someone has a question that I don’t have experience with, Danielle may be more likely able to respond,” says Ruth, adding the idea is to offer a place to gather for support where ideas can grow from the group. “We’re pretty open ended. We’ve occasionally had guest speakers. We’ve had the Milk Bank, and a really successful one with a sleep consultant—we had 20 moms that day! So if we notice people are talking a lot about a specific topic, we might try to bring someone in who can specifically address that.”
As an added benefit, Mom-to-Mom, like the Breastfeeding Support Group, meets in the resource center that is WFLC. Located in a historic home at 96 Fair Street since 1998, the center was founded in 1989 as a community outreach program assisting women and children out of St. George Church’s Peace & Justice Center in Guilford. When WFLC became a non-profit in 1991, the center expanded programming to address needs of shoreline families. Today, the independent non-profit continues to provide a safe place for women and families facing transitions and other challenges to find support, education and referral services.
“We’ve celebrated our 25th year as an organization this past year. In honor of being 25 years old, we are embarking on a capital campaign. We’re three-quarters of the way to raising $500,000!” says DeLucca.
The funds will help with facility renovations and needed infrastructure upgrades as well as program expansion.
Like the Breastfeeding Support Group, Mom-to-Mom is offered free to women from any town, DeLucca adds.
“We’re open to anyone and there’s no intake for these programs. Anyone from any background can come, drop in and just sign a simple form,” says DeLuca, “The two goals for these groups, especially the Mom-to-Mom group, is to offer a social opportunity and support. And Ruth especially understands a lot about the other resources the center offers if something should come out in discussions in this mom group, even if it’s financial, mental health, housing.”
In fact, DeLucca’s found, “either group can be a lifesaver to the women who come here. We’ve had women say they’ve been in the midst of depression, or very frustrated, or not receiving much support from a co-parent or their family, and then they come here, and now they’re in this supportive place.”
Moving the Mom-to-Mom group to Saturday mornings is an attempt to be a little more available to working moms and to be more available to moms whose weekday schedules might already be filled with programs available through libraries and other community groups, said DeLucca.
Ruth encourages moms of young ones of all stages—from newborns to young children—to come and check out a Saturday session, and bring the kids.
“We’re hoping, if we have the type of numbers we’re expecting, we could break up into maybe newer moms and moms with toddlers or young children, to allow people to get to really know others who are sort of in their same point in life,” says Ruth.
Mom-to-Mom is also a “judgment-free” space, adds Ruth.
“We live in a time when you can Google anything. I learned the hard way, when I had my daughter, the Internet can be cruel. People can be so awful and judgmental,” says Ruth. “We have worked so hard to maintain a judgment-free, supportive space where you can talk about your struggles, and we’re not going to slap you down. I think that’s really important and rare, unfortunately, in these times.”
Being mom to small ones is one of the most challenging times in life, Ruth says, and Mom-to-Mom can help.
“I think, especially for new moms, it’s a very stressful time of life, and it’s not just about kids. It’s about the relationship with your husband or partner; it’s about finances...all these pieces come together to make it stressful. We’re a place that can offer support in not just parenting, but in multiple ways, and a place for that friendship,” says Ruth.
Women & Family Life Center is located at 96 Fair Street, Guilford. For more information, visit www.womenandfamilylife.org, call 203-458-6699 or email info@womenandfamilylife.org.