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12/15/2021 07:39 AMClose to three decades ago, a woman arrived at Jerry’s Transmissions with car trouble. The news was grim—the transmission needed a replacement, which she could not then afford. Shop owner Paul Dostie provided a free transmission repair and sent her home, which will not surprise people who met him.
On Dostie’s last day this year, his family was desperately trying to get him home from the hospital so that he could spend his final moments before dying among family and friends in his own home, but scheduling an ambulance to get him there was proving logistically impossible. The hours passed. His condition worsened.
“It turns out that customer was now a nurse at Yale and when she heard what was happening, that ambulance was there in 15 minutes,” Paul’s wife Jeanne Dostie said.
Paul Dostie made it home. He died that day in comfort and peace surround by those who loved him.
That story of compassion coming full circle is remarkable, but for the family of the life-long Guilford resident and beloved husband, father, brother, and friend, it’s also part of a legacy they intend to honor with a new foundation aimed at helping others.
Paul’s dad Jerry was also a long-time Guilford icon and the Dostie family remains an integral part of the Guilford community for its small acts of kindness performed every day. Jeanne Dostie said that Paul made such an impression on residents because he was always so positive, even during the terrible struggle against glioblastoma, a disease that has no cure.
“What I would want people to know about Paul was how kind he was. He really was,” Dostie said. “He was such a community guy. He appreciated what people did for him and for the community coming out for him. Everyone who knew him will tell you the same thing. He was always so positive. He would love to know that he was helping. He put others before himself, always.”
“We knew what a special guy Paul was, but I think even our family, our kids, didn’t realize how much he meant to the community and how special he was until he got sick. I think I only saw him get mad once or twice in his life and we were together since high school. He was one of a kind,” she added.
Paul Dostie died from glioblastoma, a rare brain cancer for which there is no cure. So far research has provided only limited success in symptom management or extension of life.
“Paul was diagnosed in October of 2019 and the surgery went very well. He didn’t have any deficits, like speech or walking, and he was doing well. After standard treatment by Yale, we found a clinical trial down at Duke University,” Jeanne Dostie said. “So we found this one that we thought would be a good fit, so we went down there. He started in February of 2020 and had a relapse in August of that year and sadly the prognosis was only six weeks. But he actually began to improve and did a lot better, and did really well until this spring and symptoms started to come back. We really struggled to get an answer as to what was going on, so it was frustrating for us all.”
One of the issues facing those who have been diagnosed is that Duke University in North Carolina is the only institution in the country that has specialized treatments and studies devoted to this disease. Those who are in critical need of these services have to spend vast sums to travel to North Carolina and that is what prompted Jeanne and her family to form their organization.
The Paul Dostie KARE (Kindness Always Rewards Everyone) Foundation seeks funds to help cover the unreimbursed medical costs, especially transportation costs, for those suffering from this malady and also for a specific heart condition (HCM), with which another close family is afflicted, so that families can get loved ones to facilities that have the means to treat and deal with these rare diseases.
The organization is also gathering funds to provide for scholarships for students seeking careers in the trades. Dostie said that, as the owner of a repair shop, Paul Dostie often mentored youth and others interested in automotive careers and Jeanne and the family wanted to continue that legacy of generosity.
“That was his philosophy really, kindness. Even through his treatments, he was so upbeat. He thanked every nurse, every doctor, every phlebotomist for being so good at their jobs and helping him,” Jeanne Dostie said. “Paul felt that even if these studies didn’t help him, they might help someone else down the line. That’s the kind of person he was.”
That attitude led his family to continue those efforts after his passing.
“Paul’s sister Linda really spearheaded this,” Dostie said. “She felt like we needed to do something to honor him and keep his memory alive. He was so appreciative of everything in his life. These funds are for transportation, or whatever they need. We basically want to help people in however they can use the money, whether to pay bills, travel, anything that will ease the burden on them.”
Only launched just after this past Thanksgiving, the KARE organization has already helped two area families and will be coordinating with several others in the coming weeks.
“We certainly have a lot going on right now, but we truly believe we can help,” Jeanne said.
Anyone wishing to make a donation or to inquire about assistance from the organization can contact KARE at their website www.pauldostiekarefund.org, also via the Guilford Foundation’s website www.guilfordfoundation.org, where there is a legacy link to donate specifically to KARE, and also through the group’s Facebook page.
There is also a fundraiser planned for June 11, 2022 at the Guilford Fairgrounds. There will be music, car shows, crafters, and a corn hole tournament.