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03/16/2016 12:19 PMOn April 23, Stephanie Byrd's son, Jaxen, will have been a part of her life for 1,095 days – even though she only shared one precious day with her little boy. With no signs of complications, she joyfully carried Jaxen for 32 weeks of pregnancy before his stillbirth on April 23, 2013. Now, to honor and remember Jaxen as his third birthday approaches, Byrd is asking the North Branford community to help her collect 1,095 donated food items by April 23 to give to Food Pantry of North Branford (FPNB).
For the past two years, Byrd has privately marked the poignant anniversary of Jaxen's birthday with the support of her family and friends.
"I believe any bereaved parent will tell you that birthdays, anniversaries, and other important dates are, well, difficult," said Byrd. "For me, I think about my due date, the day Jaxen arrived, and the day I believe he died. These days become staples in our lives, ones we anticipate with a range of emotions that our face has learned to often hide. Birthdays are especially hard, as I imagine what Jaxen would be and should be doing."
Since the time of Jaxen's passing, Byrd has publicly shared her story of loss to assist non-profit Hope After Loss, formerly the Hygeia Foundation. The organization offers peer support, burial assistance, education and awareness programs for those who have experienced the loss of a baby. Byrd also participates in the annual Hope After Loss "Footprints on Our Hearts" Walk each October. In 2014, she was the walk-a-thon's keynote speaker.
This year, as Jaxen's third birthday approached, "... I wanted to do more," said Byrd.
"I want to honor Jaxen and remember him, but I also want him to leave a mark on the world and make a difference in people's lives - even if it is through me," she said. "So, I decided to support the new Food Pantry of North Branford by collecting one item for every day that Jaxen should have been here for the last three years - that's 1,095 items."
The donated items will go a long way toward helping non-profit FPNB, which opened in June 2015 and currently has more families than anticipated seeking supplemental groceries from its shelves each week. As of March 13, 2016, FPNB was helping 124 families seeking assistance; or a total of 333 people. Food donations most needed right now include pudding/Jello, cake mixes, frosting, brownie mixes, muffin mixes, single serve oatmeal, cereal, canned fruit, boxed rice, canned beans (cannellini especially), canned beets, spinach, creamed corn, mixed vegetables, jarred sauce and health and beauty items including shampoo, conditioner and body wash. Learn more about FPNB at www.facebook.com/thefoodpantryofnorthbranford
With help from family, friends, colleagues (Byrd teaches at North Branford High School) and Hope After Loss, Byrd has already collected about 250 items and hopes to see that number grow quickly in the coming weeks. She is offering to set up convenient drop-off or pick-up locations to assist anyone who'd like to make a FPNB food donation in honor of Jaxen. Shortly after April 23, she plans to deliver all of the items contributed to FPNB as one symbolic donation, inspired by Jaxen.
"I know April 23rd will still be a sad day for me," said Byrd. "It always is. That's the thing about losing a child - you learn to live with the sadness. But I will also have a reason to smile, knowing that Jaxen's life, although short, can still touch others. I will work tirelessly throughout my lifetime to keep his memory alive and help him to do good. This food collection is a great start.".
For more information or to set up a collection drop off or pickup, call (203) 379-7834 or send an email to sbyrd9598@aol.com To learn more about Hope After Loss, visit http://www.hopeafterloss.org